Everybody knows that domestic violence is an aggressive behavior used by one person in a relationship toward the other one. However, every time we hear about domestic violence, our minds create an image of beaten women, but not all the time this is true. (Du Plat-Jones 2006) “Domestic violence against men tends to go unrecognized since men are less likely to admit to or report such incidents because of embarrassment, fear of ridicule and lack of support services”. It is a taboo that has been created an ignored by society. Furthermore, the society has to see domestic violence not just as physical aggression, but everything that is related to verbal, physical, sexual, emotional or even financial abuse.
For example, according to Fontes (1999) “while a men abuse their female partner every 15 seconds in United States, females abuse their male partner every 14.6 seconds”; however, the problem does not finish there, “when the police arrive to the place many of the abused men were arrested, threatened with arrest or even ignored”. In addition, every time that the news comes out relating to domestic violence focuses on women as the victims and does not talk about domestic violence against men. It is enough reason to view to men physically and emotionally stronger than women to hind the true? “Male victims may experience broken limbs, bruising, knife wounds, teeth marks, deep scratches and lacerations, inappropriate comments, fear and intimidation, tearfulness and refuse to be physically examined”.
In Costa Rica this is not an exception. Our Constitution seem to mean all people are equal in front to the law, yet for men in marriage. This is obviously in domestic violence court, where men are treated poorly and consider guilty before having any to say is his favor. In addition, the best strategy for a man is to reject the charges, but accept the restrictions put on him by the judge. Therefore, no matter what he says, it not make any different in the hearing. To mention an example, let us take a true case from the news where in a typical family the woman always wants more money for more pretty things. The men finally open his eyes and start in a discussion about family budgets arise in these hard times. The wife gets disgruntled and makes a complaint in front of a domestic violence judge with a few tears in her eyes, and the man is in the street in hours. This is not a funny history but a true one that I saw too. Just to mention another example there was a 70 years old man who was wealthy, on the other hand, a woman who just grew up a 17 years old girls and she sent her to talk to the man, but this one avoid her and without a probe she sent him to jail. As a result, the man lost his family, just because the woman did not get his money.
True domestic violence is abominable and it needs to be sanctioned. But, so should the misuse of domestic violence laws that are used in themselves a method of coercion and intimidation and end up destroying lives. In addition, this is not reason, and there is not enough reason for a man to take the justice on his hands, yet it is time to end with the taboo. The society has to learn that the men cry too; on the other hand, the government has to apply the law against the domestic violence but at equal right for men and women.
References
Barber, C. (2008). Domestic violence against men. Nursing Standard, 22(51), 35-39. Retrieved from Academic Search Elite database. accessed: September 10, 2010
Fontes DL (1999) Information on Male Victims of Domestic Violence. http://www.safe4all.org/essays/2page.html accessed: September 10, 2010
Garland M. Baker. Shaky domestic violence laws fracture families. http://www.amcostarica.com/051010.html accessed: September 10, 2010
Plat-Jones J., D. (2006). Domestic violence: the role of health professionals. Nursing Standard, 21(14-16), 44-48. Retrieved from Academic Search Elite database.
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I agree with you post. The respect is an equal rights and freedom for everybody, by the fact of being human and without distinction of any kind of race, color, sex, language, religion, political or other opinions. However, many people have always suffered from the lack of them throughout history. In fact, the lack of human rights has a lot of effects on people lives.
ReplyDeleteI agree with your comment, but if we focus on the real violence in Costa Rica, we realize that the higher rate of violence against women than against men. It is clear that most men do not report these facts, which also surveys can be misleading.
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